Reading Until Dawn Featured Author: Aaron Ritchey

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE... 
of the Reading Until Dawn Con author features here at Alpha Heroes.  

Some bloggers could probably manage to keep a very even cadence of author profiles, reliably posting on certain days of the week, consistently and regularly like a drumbeat.

So, yeah, that's not this blogger.  As you may have surmised.  Around here, we like things a little more unpredictable.  A little more spontaneous.  A little less formal.  We had a bit of a break, but there's a nice roster of fantastic authors lining up to play with us here at Alpha Heroes.  We'll be publishing these features as they come in, as various schedules allow, so keep an eye out in your feed and check in regularly!

As a Featured Blogger (ahem) for the Reading Until Dawn conference, it is my pleasure and my sacred responsibility to showcase the delightful authors that will be hanging out and playing embarrassing SUPER FUN AND AWESOME games with us in October.  We're not doing panels.  We're not doing pitches. We're seriously not doing serious. We WILL be doing games.

If you've read Alpha Heroes for very long, you know I'm not too into author interviews. I'm not very good at them, to be honest. So just pretend this is a game instead of an interview.  I gave my authors a Mad Libs^TM style questionnaire, and here are the results!  (note: truthiness is optional... these are fiction writers after all!)

Please welcome Aaron M. Ritchey, self-described gamma hero (what exactly does that MEAN?) and sushi lover.  I stole this from his "About Me" page, and I defy you to read it and NOT want to come party with this guy:

When anyone asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, the answer was the same: a writer.  On the first day of kindergarten, when I figured out they weren’t going to teach me to read that first hour, I packed up my stuff and walked home.  Cut school on the first day of kindergarten.  That’s how I roll.

Come on now. You know you want to.

The Reading Until Dawn Con is different from typical fan conferences in that it will feature tons of games.  So here are my game-themed questions (truthiness is optional).  

1. No one ever beats me at the game of __Murder. Murder most foul.____.  I, uh, that's like a role-play thing, right? 

2. Please fill in these blanks: "When I was a kid, and they were picking teams for sportball, I was usually:
a) picked right away
b) not picked right away (Never picked. Always spurned. Why, God, why?)
c) one of the captains   Later in life, I found myself __typing “Murder Most Foul” for alphaheroes.net , which I swear was meant to be funny…or was it? __, and I think it was all because of how the sportball teams were picked. Oh yes! SUPER-funny!    

3. The most embarrassing/hilarious game I ever participated in was _underwater naked monopoly _.  Everyone was laughing at _...Laughter? There was no laughter. When I play underwater naked monopoly, I play for keeps. It’s the most dangerous of games.   I see.  Was I laughing? I didn't mean to laugh. I would never laugh.   

4. In an alternate universe, I am George R. R. Martin, only my fabulously successful 700-page epic book is titled "Game of _Self-Pity_." it is about _The lives of several writers, all living a long, long time._  Well.  That sounds... long.  Franzen-esque, perhaps even.  

5. Once,  Mario Acevedo suggested that we take over Uraguay and rule the peoples as benevolent dictators during the day and poet kings at night, and I could only respond, GAME. ON.  Then what happened? All was going well until Mario was bit by a bat and turned into a vampire. I woke up to find him drinking my blood via the heel of my left foot. I shooed him away, and he took off on a motor scooter screaming, “I am THE Felix Gomez! I live! I live!” Right.  I... I've got nothing.

6. Would you like to play the 5-words game? HIT ME!  OK, well there's no need for violence.

The 5-words game rules:

The lovely Candace Blackburn challenges you to use the following 5 words in a piece of flash fiction, as long or short as you wish. Don't overthink it :-)

Then, give 5 words for the next victim, er, interviewee to use.  They will have the option to build on your piece or do a stand-alone.

Your words are:  _drift, segment, ribbed, slick and clementine._

  
Meet Belle, P1 from Roselynn Cannes
And THEN this happened, P2 from Katee Robert

P3:

“Going somewhere in a hurry?”

Belle’s heart fell to her ankles. Not today, please, not today. She hurried on, hoping to appear she hadn’t heard him. Maybe, this time, he wouldn’t harass her. No such luck.

Gustavus LeGume drifted over to her, then matched her pace. His long legs fell in tromping boots. His hair didn’t move, too slicked, too black, too shiny--freshly washed and even more freshly combed. He whirled in front of her, stopping her march.

“You are such a strange girl, Belle, and yet, I am inexplicably drawn to you. Would you like some of my forbidden fruit?”

She wanted to growl. Actually, she wanted to bite.

He shoved a segment of an orange fruit into her face. “It is a ribbed clementine. For your pleasure.”

Her first instinct was to slap the fruit away, punch him in the face, and run. Yet, she had to remain the unassuming maiden everyone expected her to be, however different she was. Any attention she drew to herself might be dangerous.

Belle sighed and said, “Oh Gustavus, I wish I could, but of course, since I’m an unassuming maiden, I must always be limiting what I eat. For after all, a comely face requires a trim figure.”

“Of course.” His knowing nod made her want to rip the lungs from his chest, fill them up with air, and parade the grisly balloons around as an example to others. Where did such thoughts come from? She knew. All too well.

She had to get away from Gustavus and get to the willow by the church as quickly and as demurely as possible. One thing about her monthly escapades—she didn’t have to be so horrifying demure. She could horrifying in other ways. 

Wow.  Kind of hilarious, kind of grisly.... I think I like love it.  *giggles* LeGume. heheheh.

If you'd like to see more of Ritchey's work, you know the drill: check the website, then head for Amazon or the retailer of your choice.

Come back tomorrow to see what he does with Candy...  That's right, we have a two-fer from this author.  Can't wait!

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Are you registered for Reading Until Dawn Con? 

If not, why not?! Join us for fun, games, snacks and possibly pants-optional dancing.  

Register here, and see you there!

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